Billy Fong Sez

Road Tripping

Billy Fong
February 07, 2013

One should find the time for a road trip with a girl friend every year. It’s the perfect excuse to tie a Chanel scarf around your head and don some Tom Ford sunglasses, à la Thelma & Louise. (The prospect of hooking up with a young Brad Pitt makes it even more appealing.) No need to assemble a large group since the conversation is more intimate when only two are involved. Also, anything more than four resembles a tacky bachelorette party. I suggested a holiday drive from Dallas to Tallahassee, complete with a pit stop in New Orleans in order to get a foundation buzz before seeing family, to my dearest gal pal, Anna Trull, Wisconsin’s ballroom dance champion. (I love a quirky skill set!) She agreed to fly down from Madison to get in some Texas shopping first. Perfect timing, since we were able to attend the holiday parties of both Todd Fiscus and Ceron and Mark and Melinda Knowles, giving her first-hand experience with Dallas’ swellegant set.

First off, you must title your trip, and we decided on “Palace On Wheels.” For those who haven’t been to India, it’s the only way to tour the country. It’s a virtual Four Seasons-esque train that travels from one maharaja’s palace to the next.  A grand dame of Los Angeles society, Dee Sherwood, shared that little secret with me eons ago. Since Miss Trull is recently single, the concept of an available maharaja was appealing — sort of like that guy Elizabeth Hurley hooked up with after things went south post-Hugh Grant.

Aliases are also a must. On our voyage to Tallahassee, we came up with Sloane and Cameron (from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off), and on the way back, we were Georgiana Spencer and Freddie Nesbitt.  Apparently, Georgiana was the it-girl of the 18th century, and Freddie Nesbitt was a character from Gosford Park. Another brilliant reason for aliases — beyond the potential lurid possibilities — is the infinite number of outfit options. Anna as Georgiana was so incredibly Belstaff, a label I have been obsessed with for the past six months and have found impossible to locate — makes it even better, no? She borrowed a slim-fitting Beretta hunting coat of mine, a camouflage scarf that I fastened at her neck with a vintage hatpin, an A-line Carolina Herrera camel skirt and Marc Jacobs kitten heels.

Instead of Siri, I am fortunate to have Piper Wyatt (a Louisiana-born and -bred girl) and Brooke Hortenstine in my life. After some rapid-fire texts with both, Anna and I found our way to the lounge: Bellocq. I always appreciate the local fashion, and we encountered some tasty Southern boys wearing hats. One of them offered to buy my Hermès belt off of me, since there now seems to be a wait list for the classic style. Thank the Lord I bought gold and silver versions back when the economy collapsed in 2008!

When chatting with the verbose New Orleans crew we encountered, we were asked for a few words that described ourselves. My response: “Sprawling, ambitious and amazingly accomplished.”  Best way to exit a conversation and make for the perfect road-trip ending.